Episode 194 - How to Stay Steady When Everything Says Hurry

In the fall of 2020, I bought a house. I needed a few furnishings, so on the Friday after Thanksgiving I innocently wandered onto some home décor websites.

I was not prepared for the full-force assault on my senses that is Black Friday shopping.

I remember saying to a friend at the time, “I should have worn a helmet.”

Now, I’m not here to tell anyone they should or shouldn’t buy those bamboo sheets they’ve been eyeing.

But what I do know is this:

The urgency of Black Friday is a perfect metaphor for what happens when scarcity intensifies, and impulse takes over. 

And while I love a good sale, what I love even more is the feeling of integrity, intuition, and ease in shopping, and in my life. 

In today's episode, I've included a special, soothing meditation to help you get less swept up by the noise outside, and settle back into sanity and self.

Click here, get cozy, and listen in. 

With love, 

Mary 

P.S. If you’re craving a slower, softer way to move through the season, my new book Sensing the Sacred is the perfect anchor. it makes a lovely gift for someone you cherish, including yourself!  You can explore the book and gift bundles here.

• Transcript. How to Stay Steady When Everything Says Hurry

  Episode 194

   Hello beautiful beings, and welcome to today's episode, which is part episode and part meditation. Coming to you on the week of Black Friday. So Black Friday is a cultural phenomenon here in the United States where after the holiday of Thanksgiving, we all take part in a big fat shopping orgy. Oh my heavens, not all of us. I remember when I was a kid in the 80s and my parents, you know, back then, the internet didn't exist. So my parents would be like, why on earth would anyone go to the mall? When, you know, all these crowds and people punching each other over TVs and Walkmans? And now Black Friday is a global phenomenon due to the internet. And as you probably know, it's a time where there's a lot of sales and wheels and deals, and that can be partly freaking awesome because you can stock up on some of your favorite items that may rarely go on sale, and maybe save some money, but also not so awesome if you. Tend to get really swept up, as many of us do in the pressures of this time of year. And, you know, while this episode and the meditation that follows is about moving through Black Friday from a place of sovereignty rather than scattered ness. The bigger theme of this episode is moving from a place of presence rather than a place of pressure, because a lot of numbers and flashing sale signs and, you know, again, all these tactics. And I was just reflecting to a friend the other day about how interesting it is that in the language of marketing and sales, it's always the language of sports that we use to describe, like tactics and strategy and target market and acquisition. And, you know, it's just interesting that the language of sales and strategies to make us buy is rooted not just in sports, but also in the language of warfare, but I digress. These things have a very real impact on our nervous system, and by no means do I want to stand in the way of you stocking up on your favorite bamboo sheets this season. However, I want to support you in doing so from a place of it feeling really, really good and like you're moving from these deep oak tree roots down beneath you, rather than being whipped around in the wind, hanging on to a thin branch for dear life while you're surfing. Wayfair, if you know what I mean. Been there many times, and actually, the reason I had the idea to share this episode is because I recorded this Black Friday meditation several years ago because as a business owner, every year I feel pressure of like, Black Friday is coming, I gotta do something to capitalize. And you might know, if you listen to last week's episode that I launched the first copies, limited edition copies of my brand new book, which is called Sensing the Sacred. And it's a body based approach to presence and spiritual practice. And, you know, I just got this, like, literal wild hair, like I should do something special for the book. I mean, listen to my voice. It's like I'm riding on horseback summoning this warriors, and I worked myself into a big cyclone of a tizzy planning things out, doing spreadsheets, you know, blah blah, blah. And then I realized, oh, I'm doing that thing. I am allowing myself to get swept up in this cyclone of pressure. And I walked over to my yoga mat where whenever I'm feeling stuck, I'll kind of get on the mat and do an embodiment practice to help to move through some of that swirling, confusing, foggy energy and land more deeply in my body and my instincts and my deeper knowing. And I didn't even have to get on the mat. My friends, as soon as my little bare foot felt that rubber, it was like a somatic memory of like, oh yeah, no, we're not doing that, sweetie. Like, we're not jumping on this bandwagon from a place of being afraid that if I don't, I'm going to miss out on something whenever I do something like this. In my business, particularly when it comes to a physical product. It's got to feel really landed and really energetically solvent. You know, where I'm not overextending and Over promising and suffering behind the scenes. Work in progress around that always. And I feel so peaceful around it. You know, I will send emails. There is a gift bundle, but I hope this story lands as a gesture of reassurance that you have permission to not buy anything on Black Friday or that weekend if it doesn't serve you, or if you don't want to. I actually read a little bit about this whole phenomenon and the fact that, you know, sometimes companies will raise the prices in the month of October so that they can make it look like there's a bigger savings on the day. And I don't mean in any way to, uh, disparage or discourage people from supporting businesses out there that are doing amazing things and providing amazing products, but more to nudge us all into a relationship with the way that we spend and the way that we share our gifts and resources. In a way that feels like it comes from a place that's sourced within. Rather than a place where you have one arm up riding a Bronco Bronco bucking mechanical bull. That was the metaphor I was going for. I've ever ridden a mechanical bull, so I don't exactly know the language, but I know that's how I feel as I'm just riding around and my adrenaline's pumping. It's like, either that or I feel like I've been shot with tranquilizer dart, and I'm just this ghost that's floating and swirling around to different websites. And then I wake up the next day with a financial and emotional hangover. And while I don't have the answers for what anyone else should or shouldn't do around their purchasing and around Black Friday, what I do know is that moments of presence and dropping in and connecting with your body and your deeper voice has ripples of joy and beauty that extend to every aspect of your life and to all of our lives. Because when we regulate our individual nervous systems, our collective nervous system benefits as well. And because I am a business owner, I do want to add that this is the final weekend to purchase one of the first edition, limited edition signed copies of Sensing the Sacred, and there is a savings on the three book bundle. And it just makes such an extraordinary gift, especially for feminine souls in your life who are craving more slowness and more candlelit moments, and just more of a sumptuous approach to connecting with themselves. And so you can find out more about that and support my small business on Saturday or any day at the link below this episode. Or just go straight to Mary Lofgren comm. And so with that, we shall sail into today's meditation. Get yourself cozy. Tuck your feet under a blanket and let's begin. So when the outside world gets really busy. There can be a lot of pressure to move at someone or something elses pace. And in this time. We'll take a moment to reconnect with your own inner pace. And so if you like, you can close your eyes. Let your body start to become heavy. Wherever you're seated. Letting your nerve endings hang down. And starting to sense and feel. Floor chair. So that you can sink a bit more of your weight. Into that support. Or here in the physical. You don't have to hold it all together. Hold it all up. Force has. Gravity has got you to drop down and drop in. If you like, you can place hands on the body. Belly. Heart. As you start to feel the steady rhythm of your breath. No need to breathe in any fancy or specific way. Simply feeling that. Inhale. And that exhale. Your own inner metronome. And as you feel into the base of your body. The lower parts of your body. From this rooted place, I invite you to open your awareness to this feeling of pressure that can come this time of year. Pressure to do. Pressure to be. Pressure to have. Pressure to get. And we start here to semantically study what does this pressure feel like? So that we can be more attuned to when it's happening. And so noticing. Are there places in your body? Are there specific sensations that you notice? Is there warmth cool. Tingling tension. And where's the impulse is often to react or take an action in response to this pressure. I invite you to just pause and be with it. Bringing the eyes of the witness to it. And then I invite you to feel something even bigger than that. As you feel into your whole body and your whole being. Or this pressure might be an experience your body is having, but where it is not a fullness of who you are. And so you can let that pressure go. Now, as we draw more of your awareness to the fullness of your body and your being. Allowing a breath and inhale and exhale to emerge from the heart. Of this bigness, this wholeness. His part that is infinite. Continue breathing that into your body. Dropping in the question, are there any places where I might soften into this wholeness more fully? And from here. Drop in some affirmations and if they feel true, I invite you to not just let them land in your mind as thoughts. Put land in your body as truth. I can go slow. I set my own pace. I can check in with my inner world before making big decisions in my outer world. I spend in alignment with my values. It is okay to take breaks, to feel my body and to let it lead me. I can go slow. I set my own pace. I check in with my inner world before making big decisions in my outer world. I spend in alignment with my values. It is okay to take breaks, to feel my body and to let it lead me. And we'll start to seal this practice now. Allowing your body's wisdom to settle into your cells. And starting to feel once again the stability of the Earth. And knowing that you can always return back to this center of gravity, your center. As you navigate through this day and this life.