Episode 158 - Three Unexpected Paths To More Energy
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00:00
Hello, loves, just a heads up that about midway through this episode I moved the mic closer to my mouth and it can be a little startling around minute 16. It gets a bit louder and richer, so I wanted to just give a heads up before you hit. Play and enjoy today's episode of Coming to your Senses. And enjoy today's episode of Coming to your Senses. Hello, beautiful, and welcome to the Come to your Senses podcast. I'm your host, award-winning certified feminine embodiment coach, licensed esthetician and enthusiastic foster dog mama to animals across the land, mary Lofgren. Here we explore how to bring more richness, radiance, peace and pleasure to our lives, homes and hearts through the joy of beauty, the wisdom of the body, the warmth of connection and the splendor of the senses. I'm so glad you're here. Pull up a poof and let's dive in. Hello, beautiful beings, and welcome to today's episode, which is all about three unexpected pathways to more energy.
01:25
Now, when I start working with a coaching client, giving them more energy is not necessarily what I think is really going to help them. You know, I think all of us wish we had more hands, more time in a day, more, more, more. But have you ever noticed that the more time you have. The more convenience you have, it's kind of like the more you find to do to fill this time. And it is a natural human instinct to grow and develop and to build. But in a productivity obsessed culture, that natural instinct can become something unnatural and can drive us to move from a less than conscious place. Let's put it that way Often when I start working with a client, it's not necessarily that they need more energy, but it's rather that we need to take the energy that is currently going up and out towards their outside life, their outside circumstances, and redirect that energy down and in to awareness, in the body and communication with some of the more subtle messages of the body that can give us clues for how to operate in the world with more wisdom and with more magnetism. And so the reason I titled today's episode Unexpected Paths to More Energy is because there will be no Ginkgo Biloba supplements endorsed on this episode. It's not about making us more speedy, necessarily. It's about identifying three areas where we tend to lose a lot of energy unconsciously and reclaiming that energy that might be spilling out and leaking out. Energy that might be spilling out and leaking out and placing it back where it belongs, which is in the garden of your own body and being.
03:53
I will say that this episode is timely for me because I'm at a phase of my life where I'm studying my energy very closely. I'm studying my energy very closely and that brings me to something I want to share with you, which is about two weeks ago I opened the garden gates to the Come to your Senses Sanctuary, which is our brand new membership community, where we go deeper and richer with some of the concepts and tools and methods shared here and where I also share more personally from my own life than I do in the public sphere. And it has been such a delight to tango with all the sanctuaryettes in this brand new experience. And my plan was to end the opening celebration rate, which is a special reduced rate just for our opening month on June 27th. But what's also happening right now is that I am packing up to move to Northern California for the summer. I'm going to be in San Francisco and in the East Bay, and those of you who have listened to the podcast for a while, you know that it's been my deep desire to move there for a long time, and so this is phase two of making that dream a reality.
05:26
And here's where I want to insert two life tips. One, when you're painting your bathroom or any other room in your house I'm currently painting my guest bathroom because I'm renting out my house for the summer bathroom, because I'm renting out my house for the summer I recommend painting naked. I cannot tell you how many pieces of clothing that I've ruined, not just from you know, foolishly wearing regular clothes to paint, thinking, oh, I'll just touch up this one spot, but you know, socks like just. I find that it is infinitely more pleasurable and meditative to paint naked but also really saves your clothing. That's life tip one. Life tip number two, which is a hard-earned gem of wisdom for me this week, is don't plan to make a big move in your business while you're also making a big move across the country. And so all of that is to say that we are extending the opening celebration savings until July 3rd, so you have a few more days to come in receive the special savings. Another gem and jewel that I want to plop in your lap is that on our opening weekend, july 6th, we have the Joys of Summer Retreat, and for everyone who joins before that opening celebration savings expires, you will be invited to join us at the Joys of Summer retreat. So head to schoolofsensuallivingcom slash sanctuary or click the link below this episode, to get the absolutely best rate for the duration of your sanctuary experience and to also be folded into the sumptuous, sensuous joys of summer.
07:30
And so, when it comes to paths to creating more energy, it's common to think about our energy stores like they're a gas tank, and there are times where we have more in the reserves, times where we have less. And this is a logical and scientific way to think about it, scientific way to think about it. But perhaps a more feminine, more holistic way to think about energy is thinking about energy like a river. For example, there can be days where my hormonal cycle is at its peak and I slept really well the night before, but because I'm worried about some emotional stressor, my energy is all being poured into this one tide pool that has formed on the side of the river. And so all of that to say that our physical body is really just one light beam in the prism of the full matrix of our system of energy. There is our emotional body, our mental body, our energetic body, and so the pathways that I want to share with you today are really about helping to establish that homeostasis in the river of your energy.
09:01
So our first gem, the first unexpected path to more energy, is the gem of honesty. And so if you find yourself tired, exhausted, irritated, feeling like something's not working in your life, a really powerful question to drop in is where am I pretending by pretending? Pretending takes a ton of energy and honesty also takes a ton of energy. However, honesty is what I like to think of as a closed loop system. So I'm sure you can relate to this experience where maybe there's a relationship or a work dynamic or some place in your life where you're withholding something and you muster up the courage to have the conversation and all of a sudden there is sometimes, I find, like a euphoria that settles in.
10:24
I had an experience like this recently where I knew I had a truth to tell and it was so uncomfortable and I was worried about it and obsessing about it and cleaning the dining room table and my lips are moving, practicing the conversation, you know, and finally I said the words that I needed to say and I had had this really intense tightness in my pectoral muscles leading up to that that I thought was just stress or, you know, unrelated. And as soon as I said the truth, it was like someone had taken a scissor to a piece of twine that was being pulled tight and snipped it and my whole chest completely released. And so tension, you know, any kind of tension, whether it's physical tension, emotional tension blocks the flow of energy. If we think about this on even a microscopic level, think about this on even a microscopic level, I'm laughing because sometimes someone will say something and it's just not appropriate for me to tell the absolute truth, the if you've ever seen the movie the invention of lying style truth where there's absolutely it's this movie storyline where they live in a world where lying doesn't exist. So everybody is just saying what they honestly think about the other person. And it's really funny.
12:02
And in a situation where maybe I've just met the person or it's just, you know, not kind for me to share what I really think and feel, I'll notice there's like this little eye twitch that happens or my brow will furrow, and so it's like any time we ask of our bodies and of our beings to withhold the truth, there is tension created in the physical, emotional and mental body. This gem of honesty is if you find yourself feeling, like so many of us do, that there's something hanging over your head or hanging over your life. Once again, a question to drop in there is where am I pretending? Where is there a truth that needs to be shared, that I haven't been willing to confront? Where is there a conversation or an apology that I need to share, something I need to own?
13:12
You know, once I needed to make an apology and this was an apology several years in the making, and I was very nervous about it, and finally the apology happened and I had no idea how much of my energy had been bound up in the fear that I might run into that person someday. I mean, of course, this wasn't a conscious redistribution of my energy, but in the subconscious, there was a micro level of tension and bracing that was always keeping me protected, and this person lives on the other side of the world. It's not like it would be likely that I'd run into them in my town, but it's like the body holds that storehouse of information, of threat, real or imagined, and all of that, maintaining all of that, takes energy, and so this is our first gem. Our next gem is a reference to something I shared earlier in the podcast, which is to ask yourself where your energy is going up and out and to explore what emerges when you bring that energy back down and in. And so every time I do an embodiment coaching session, we start with a embodiment process, a drop in, and one of the cues that I'll give is calling your energy back to your body Now, calling your energy back home to yourself yourself.
15:10
Energy hangs out in the future, in the past, in the need to pick up toilet paper, all of these different places. It's like our bodies are these masterpieces of multitasking, but most of this is happening in the subconscious, and so you can actually try this right now. If you think about something that takes up a lot of your energy, like your kids, or a creative project or a dream that you deeply, deeply desire but that has yet to be fulfilled, most likely there's a lot of thoughts, a lot of emotion, a lot of energy that's going outward towards those things, dreaming up scenarios in the future, tracking what's happening in the present, and I invite you to imagine that all that energy that is going out is to close that loop and bring all that energy back to yourself, and I like to imagine that the energy that is currently streaming outward. It's like I call it back home and I draw it in and draw it back to myself. And, of course, this isn't something that we can permanently alter, because our energy is meant to go out into those places. But even if we can reclaim 1% of that energy, what happens is that that energy that is often pushing us and prodding us to move according to our fears, when it is placed back in our bodies and back in the present moment, that energy becomes a tool of navigation to make our moves and to make our decisions from a more embodied, more authentic, more aligned place.
17:23
You know, one of the reasons that I created the sanctuary was to create a place for us to explore a feminine path to presence, because I'll often hear clients and friends say oh gosh, I just, I wish I could slow down, I wish I could just burn my to-do list and go on vacation. There's so much stimulation, there's so much happening in my life, there's so much happening in the world. I wish I could just, you know, slow down and rest and go on vacation for a week or whatever. But actually, what I really hear underneath that plea is not a request for more energy, nor is it a request for more rest, even although usually that's part of it? What it's a request for is more presence, because we can be in incredibly shifting sands, but when we have that sense of embodied presence, there is a safety inside of change, when our energy and our mental faculties and our emotions are either being buried in the subconscious or waving around like a windsock. And the great news about this kind of embodied presence is that it can be cultivated and can become a working part of our system.
19:11
I recently learned a term that I love, which is myelination. And this is when our nerve endings in our nervous system, which might ordinarily be conditioned or positioned towards that primal fight or flight with the cultivation of presence and embodied awareness, become almost coated in like a sheath and redirect more towards a position of wisdom and rootedness. And I found that so incredibly validating that when I'm feeling stressed and all over the place like there is a physical, biological process that's happening in my nerve endings that's making them look like the hair on a baby chick, going in every single different direction, and that practices like stillness, slowness, creating a sanctuary within ourselves that we can come home to and come back to. Like that that is not just a spiritual, abstract concept, it's an actual physical, biological process. And the sanctuary is a place where, rather than always having to self start with that process of practice, you can be guided into an experience of receiving and practice in community.
20:54
So little side note, little sidebar for the sanctuary, because you know I was sharing last week about how I have run out of things to say. I mean, I haven't really run out of things to say, but I've run out of things to say in this current context because I've shared a lot of ideas over the last 150 episodes on ways to slow down and ways to practice, ways to practice. And ultimately, what is at the heart of every single one of those episodes is coming back to this place of presence. And rather than just talking about it, I am ready to teach it, practice it with you and be in community around it. And so head to the sanctuary to learn more about joining a community, to practice this feminine path to presence. And the final gem that I want to share with you is kind of our last gem in a bit of a reverse, and this gem is maybe you just need to beat the shit out of some pillows.
22:13
So energy, you know, there's a lot of things that might distract our energy or overstimulate our energy, but sometimes what's really robbing us of our energy is like stagnation in the body, and I experienced this a lot, where I'm having those 4pm tired, bleary eyed moments and I think, oh, I should meditate, or, oh, I should rest, or, oh, I should do something relaxing, because I'm feeling this externalized experience of stress and racing thoughts, but inside I feel exhausted and what needs to happen often in those moments is actually not a slowing down of energy, but it is more an expression of some of that instinct that has been pent up, because usually when I am in that spot and having those feelings, I've been sitting at my desk for several hours and my energy hasn't moved several hours and my energy hasn't moved. And beating pillows is one way to express excess energy simply going outside and experiencing some sunshine on your skin. This is one of the reasons I love fostering dogs, because they give me a reason to be in that habitual practice of going out and being in nature and moving my body Another way in which our energy gets trapped. And the reason I say beat the shit out of some pillows is because, you know, a walk might do the trick, but if there is impacted emotional energy or if there is a habitual turning off or turning down of the instinctual body, that really catches up with us and it's kind of like a log falling into the river, like the river of our energy needs that bubbling, moving current. And when we've been sitting in a desk all day quietly resenting our co workers, we might need to do something a little bit more than a walk along a greenway. We might need to take some of that healthy aggression that gets modulated by being in a civilized environment and workplace and actually give it some voice and some expression, so that it doesn't end up becoming a bag of Cheetos down the hatch on the couch when you get home, like it has for me many, many times in my life. And so, my darlings, these are your gems on unexpected paths to energy.
25:15
If you enjoyed this episode, I would be so delighted to hear about it in a review on iTunes. I would also be deeply honored if you shared this episode with someone that you love, who you think could also stand to beat the shit out of some fellows, or who you think might just enjoy the experience of coming to their senses. Know that this is the crystal shaving of the hunk of gem that you will find in the sanctuary where each week, we take a different aspect of coming to our senses, create a small ritual of loveliness around, creating sanctuary in our mind, in our heart, in our homes and in our bodies, and where we practice it together in community, and come and celebrate this feminine, embodied beauty, soaked path to presence. Thank you so much for listening. I will see you in our next episode.
As I pack up this week to go spend the summer in San Francisco (phase two of a big dream!), I'm paying close attention to my energy.
What if, instead of a gas tank that fills and empties, energy was like a river?
What if instead of trying to steal or grab energy from outside places, we could tend the banks of that river within and watch the water swell?
What if the replenishment of that river came not from the latest hack or strategy, but from partnership with your body's already abundant pool of magnetism?
Today on the pod we're answering these questions, and so much more. I'm so excited to share these three unexpected tools with you.
With love,
Mary
P.S. - This episode features two important life tips, one of which describes why we're extending the Opening Celebration Savings on our new Sanctuary community a few more days. Don’t miss this chance to save up to $350, and score a private session with yours truly!
